Thursday, February 02, 2006

Oh, Come On! Part Two Hundred And Six

From the Times today:

In New York Schools, Whole Milk Is Cast From the Menu
To reduce the risks of obesity, diabetes and other health problems, New York City has decided to serve one percent and skim milk.

I haven't read the article, of course, and I know there was something in the paper a couple weeks ago about a program to encourage bodega shoppers to buy lowfat milk but: like it's really the thimbleful of whole milk served and likely unopened on the cafeteria tray that's causing childhood diabetes and obesity. Maybe it's the chips eaten for breakfast (how many times have we all seen that on the subway and wanted to cry? or maybe that's just me), the McDonald's for dinner, the soda constantly imbibed, the tater tots I know they're serving alongside the whole milk. Maybe the whole milk is the only actual food these kids get all day, even with the hormones and God knows what else they pump it full of. Maybe the problem lies in the fact that we have an underclass, and no one wants to admit it, or do anything to address the root causes of potato chips for breakfast. Because look, some has-beens are skating with celebrities!

Forgive me for being more humorless than usual. I'm in a bad mood after hearing Bush say this yesterday: "I'm the educator in chief" and "in times of uncertainty it's my job to explain our path to victory."

I can no longer pretend I'm in a six-year-long episode of Mystery Science Theatre 3000 wherein the goofy unreal images on the screen are Bush and his merry band of big fat liars, who are aliens to the human race and the compassion needed to govern, and I can vent my rage by supplying alternative dialogue to state of the union speeches, NPR broadcasts, and various periodicals. Good thing the Republicans keep keeping it easy to get a gun. Oh, wait, but they've made it so they could probably imprison me for writing this.